Greetings! This month’s topic is on conflict resolution. Skills can be used to help resolve conflicts with family, friends, business associates and in day-to-day interactions.
Here is a checklist to go through when you are in a conflict situation.
- Do a body check. Are you starting to get irritated and angry? Where do you feel it in your body- your muscles, stomach or jaw?
- Take a deep breath. Breathing slows the heart down and helps dissipate stress hormones that are activated when we get angry.
- Determine what the conflict is about. Many times people are talking about different issues. Clarify what’s really important to you in the discussion.
- Take a TIME-OUT. It’s important to take responsibility for your own anger without blaming the other person. Communicate that you are getting angry and you don’t want the situation to escalate. Taking even a fifteen minute break is helpful.
- Remember that no one wins. Attack the problem or issue but not the other person. Take the first step toward resolution by taking the initiative to listen.
- Empathy and compassion go a long way in resolving all types of conflicts. We can’t fix the problems in the world until we let go of the violence in our own hearts.